What to say after matching on Hinge
By RMH Editorial. Updated .
After matching on Hinge, check whether there is already a comment or question to answer. If there is, respond to that. If the conversation is empty, choose one detail from their profile and ask about it. You can also start with a normal greeting. Use the situation picker below to find a next step without treating a match as a promise of a reply.
Looking for the app feature? Read how to reply to a specific message on Hinge. The guide below covers what to write.
What has happened in the chat?
Choose the situation you can see. The examples below are drafts, so replace any personal detail that isn't true for you.
Start with one detail
Pick something from their profile that you want to hear about. This example fits a hiking photo. Change the topic if it doesn't fit the person.
Where was your hiking photo taken? I'm looking for a walk with a view.
Answer the comment they already sent
If someone asked about a trip in your photo, tell them something about the trip. You don't need to restart with a separate opener. Add a detail that gives them somewhere to take the conversation, such as a place you enjoyed or something you would do differently.
Read their actual words before using a suggested line. A joke might deserve a joke back. A practical question might need a straight answer. You can keep your response short without ignoring what they said.
When neither person has started
Either of you can start the conversation. If you want to talk, send a message when you have time. You don't need to wait a calculated number of hours or decide whose turn it is based on who liked whom.
Choose a profile detail you want to know more about. A photo of a meal can lead to a restaurant question. A hobby can lead to asking how they got into it. If there isn't much detail, "What's something you're looking forward to this week?" is a reasonable opening.
What to say after a greeting
A greeting is an invitation to start talking, even if it gives you little material. Say hello and add something from their profile or your own day. Don't turn the first reply into a complaint about how they opened.
If they continue to give you little to respond to, you can stop. A match doesn't make you responsible for keeping the exchange alive alone.
A first message you can stand behind
Use an example as a draft. Remove any claim that isn't true about you, such as liking a band you have never heard. Avoid questions about a stranger's exact address, daily movements, or other details they have not offered.
A compliment about a choice they made can give you a topic, such as a dish they cooked or a book they recommend. You don't need to rate their appearance or make a sexual comment to show interest.
If the conversation doesn't start
A message can be easy to answer and still receive no response. You cannot tell from silence whether the problem was the wording, their schedule, or their interest. Give them room and spend your attention where the conversation is mutual.
If someone has declined or asked you to stop, stop. Rewriting the opener is not a way around that answer.